As I was writing the last article Self-Worth = Success, this question suddenly dawned on me:

Is the fear of not pursuing something we desire less painful than potentially trying and failing at this very thing?

Maybe this is what holds people from what they truly want in life; they subconsciously justify that the pain of not trying would be less severe than the pain endured if they were to try and fail. But... then there is a chance that the pain of regret (down the road) being far superior than not trying AND trying/failing.

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Naturally, I took a quick break from writing this and asked our instagram community what they thought was more painful: Trying and failing, or the regret from not trying at all.  

Here are the findings:

119 out of 140 (85%) people believe that regret is more painful than never having pursued something you deeply desire.

I believe the same. Bleh... thinking about possibly regretting something on my death bed that I could have easily done when I was so capable of doing makes me nauseous to even think about! So why am I still so afraid to sing in public? And believe me, I've thought about this loads.

And this goes for you too... if you have a dream that you haven't lived out or even tried to chip away at, you first have to make the realization that you will in fact regret not pursuing whatever it is that you're currently thinking of. If you have concluded this and are cringing at the thought of regret whilst laying on your death bed, try these things, like now-

1.) Stop giving a fck about what other people will think

I've recently come to realize this: Everyone is living in a different reality. We are literally interpreting everything we see, hear, feel and think differently. To try and judge someone's reality with another's would simply be inaccurate. Someone's interpretation of your reality (life) is automatically an illusion of your actual reality. Are you still with me? Lmao.

They literally cannot make an accurate judgement because they are not you, they are not living your life, they are not thinking your thoughts and feeling your feelings. So why the hell are you going to care about someone who is viewing a distorted version of your life? Everyone is on their own journey. Focus on yours.

2.) Hold yourself accountable

Example: Dear reader, I vow to post a video of me singing on my blog by the end of 2019. LMAO I just got nervous and nauseous, please hold me accountable, lolllll.

3.) Practice

Want to know a way to build confidence in anything you’re trying to accomplish?— by building on what it is you’re trying to accomplish, AKA, practicing! ☺️ And I can tell you with confidence... the hardest part is STARTING. Been there, I survived, I’m alive and this blog brings me a happiness that I haven’t ever really experienced before to be quite honest.

4.) Make the pain of not trying/regretting SO painful that you have no choice but to try.

I am literally envisioning myself as the cutest little 80 year old baking, cooking and hanging with my grandchildren - encouraging them to go after whatever makes their chest vibrate with passion only to realize how big of a hypocrite I've been for never having pursued my own! I could literally tear up at just that thought. I guess this is sort of self-sabotaging, but like, an effective form... yeah let's go with that 🤣.

To further support my rambling above in hopes of encouraging you to live your absolute best life and regret absolutely nothing... I looked up the most common regrets of the dying. As I was researching these regrets, I kept coming across articles that would mention a book titled: "Top 5 Regrets of the Dying". After seeing it for a third time, I checked it out an Amazon and you betcha I got the Kindle version for $1.99!

According to Bronnie Ware, a palliative nurse, here are the collective top 5 regrets of the patients she worked with:

1. I wish I had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
2. I wish I hadn't worked so hard.
3. I wish I had the courage to express my feelings.
4. I wish I'd stayed in touch with my friends.
5. I wish I had let myself be happier.

So, say the damn thing you're afraid to say, pursue the damn thing you're afraid to do, let loose, nurture friendships and stop caring about other people's inaccurate interpretations of your life.

P.s. This was a beautiful little book. If you want the full read, you can purchase it here.

Ok! I'm done. Hopefully this gave you the little push you've been looking for to live the life you've been craving.

Stephanie Daily

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