RUT: Rude, Ugly and Tired

I recently heard that RUT stands for Rude, Ugly and Tired. I chuckled a bit because it’s so true. At its literal meaning, a rut is: a habit or pattern of behavior that has become dull and unproductive but is hard to change.

I was at the tail-end of my own rut when I heard that silly definition, which was pretty ironic. What got me in it? I believe what pushed me off the deep-end was the unsustainable diet I had put myself on and a lack of discipline and self-love.

I felt stuck, insecure, unproductive, unworthy, uncomfortable and began doubting my capabilities, ambition, direction and purpose.

How to get out of a rut

This is what helped me: I allowed myself to completely feel each of those heavy and uncomfortable emotions (the spiral lasted 2 weeks, beginning to end). I tried my very best to give myself compassion over negative self-talk and sabotaging thoughts. And lastly, what truly pulled me out was action/ discipline.

The opposite is true.

More often than not, I believe the opposite is what we need. We may feel one way but what is best for us is likely the complete opposite of what we want in the present moment.

Example: “I really don’t want to work out and eat healthy right now/ today”. The opposite is exactly what we need (working out and eating healthy) to feel better internally and externally.

The opposite was true when I found myself in that rut. I did not want to do work. I did not want to write. I did not want to grow. I felt scared. I felt insecure and doubtful. Quite honestly I still feel this way, but not to the extent that clouded my mind when I was in that rut. What I wanted most was to stop sitting in these emotions, but my repeated unhealthy/ unproductive behaviors were making them grow stronger.

I began reflecting on my habits and realized I was not setting myself up for having a good day. I was actually self-sabotaging myself the second I woke up.

And I was fcking over it. So what did I do? I created a habit tracker on excel 😂, printed it out and taped it to the back of my bedroom door.

DM or Email to request the habit tracker. I’ll even change the color scheme to your favorite color 😉.

The creation of the habit tracker alone gave me some motivation to get up the next day and begin ticking things off the list. The tracker also held me accountable by seeing each small habit written out right in front of me. Though the habits were small, each one compounded on the next, and by the end of the day, I felt a little more accomplished than the day before.

My new habits were creating new evidence that contradicted my negative self-talk.

Here are some other ways friends from our Insta community have pulled themselves through and out of their own ruts:

• Going outside

• Being around positive people
• Writing/ journaling
• Self work (life coach/ therapy)
• Goal setting
• Cleaning
• Self-help books/ audio books
• Switch up your routine/ start something new

• Exercising (most commonly mentioned!)
• Meditation
• Weekend trips
• Stopped canceling on plans
• Focusing on gratitude and what you have
• Cannabis
• Uplifting music
• Positive affirmations
  

I want to leave you with 3 things that I know for certain:

1. Happiness is not found nor kept, it is created and recreated time and time again (by you).
2. Life is easier when you give yourself compassion and focus on gratitude.
3. A LOT of people are going through these ups and downs. A lot more than we could ever know.

With that being said, be kind to yourself and others. We truly never know what someone is dealing with.Thank you to EVERYONE who shared some advice on how they pull themselves out of these ruts! I hope this article helped you in some way if you’re going through this sort of rut.With so much love,Stephanie Daily

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